|
I Am A Mistake
To anyone who has been judged after they
have been saved
Dear lord,
Forgive me for I have
sinned,
Over and over and over again,
But in my defense,
So have all my friends.
I have been drunk,
And
have made love,
I have been smoking,
And hoping,
I wouldn’t give in,
I have said your name in vane
I
have acted really lame,
And believe me I write this in shame,
Right now every one is disappointed in my life,
And
believe me,
So am I,
But hey its life,
I have to get over it some time,
Dear Lord,
I have sinned,
Time
and time again,
But in my defense,
This is the life you made me live,
And I ask for your forgiveness again,
Time
and time again
Because I always choose to fucking ignore,
(There I go)
The signs you have tried to make me live for.
I
lie,
And cry,
I have thought about suicide
So I guess that makes me want to die,
Though really I just want
to fly,
And I used to want to sit by your side,
But lately my vision is blind,
Most likely because Im so high,
My
whole life is like a crime,
And I just wish I could deny,
I can’t even say I tried,
Because I always go back
and multiply,
And now you all may judge the way I have spent my time,
But I guess I might has well state,
“I
know I am a mistake”
And I deserve what ever comes my way……
Author's Comments:
"I
just want to state"THIS POEM IS NOT ABOUT ME!!!! I worte it because we all have made mistake and I dont think any one should
judge any one"
I'm Tired
I’m tired,
Of the things they say,
I’m tired,
Of the games they play,
I’m
tired,
Of the worlds bullshit,
I’m tired of the reeking havoc.
I’m tired,
Of being told what
to say,
I’m tired,
Of Her complaints,
I’m tired,
Of this worlds crime,
I’m tired of living
in a lie.
I’m tired,
Of hearing “You’re to young”,
I’m tired,
Of trying
to love their dreams as my own,
I’m tired,
Of being a lost soul,
I’m tired of being in this all alone.
I’m
tired,
Of this life,
I’m tired,
Of writing my cries,
I’m tired how you say “it will be fine”.
I’m
tired,
Of you judging the worst of me,
I’m tired,
Of the crime you push on me,
I’m tired,
Of all
my selfish sins,
I’m tired,
Of feeling insane!
I’m tired,
Of saying I hate,
I’m tired,
Of saying I can’t wait,
I’m tired of trying to explain.
I’m tired,
Of being pushed away,
I’m
tired,
Of no sleep at night,
I’m tired of being sad all the time.
I’m tired,
Of writing this
line,
I’m tired,
Of no life,
I’m tired,
I won’t go any more with out saying,
Lord save my
soul,
Bring me back to life,
Some other time….
Im Tired Again
I’m
tired
Of being this way
I’m tired,
Of playing his games,
I’m tired,
Of him turning it all on me,
I’m
tired,
Of being lonely
I’m tired,
Of hearing I dont care
I’m tired
Of bleeding in this chair,
I’m
tired,
Of him wanting to say goodbye
I’m tired,
Of wondering if its all a lie,
I’m tired,
Of
him telling me not to cry,
I’m tired,
Of wanting to die,
I’m tired
Of my dreams at night
I’m
tired
Of things that go on this time
I’m tired,
Of the music I play,
I’m tired,
Of what D.J's
say,
I’m just tired of him not knowing when to stay a wake
I’m tired,
Of feeling helpless in
his arms,
I’m tired,
Of never letting down my guard,
I’m tired,
Of taking the fall,
Yes I’m
just tired of it all.
Older
He sits alone in his mind,
The look on his face tells you every thing is not alright,
He cries with
no one by his side,
What ever he tells you it’s a lie.
He’s not alright….
He carry’s
the weight of the world on his shoulders,
And after all is said and over,
At the end of the days he’s just getting
older
It's Always Some One Else
To every one
else
There’s some one sitting by a bed side
table,
Wishing he could get some help,
There’s some one laying in the arms of an angel,
Just wishing she was
some where else
There’s an old man,
Wishing he could use his hands,
There’s a widow,
Wishing he
would come back to her again,
There are lovers,
In arms that are not each others,
And there are alcoholics,
Wishing
they could drink away their problems,
There’s always something more,
There’s always some one better
then the one before
Who’s to say, that we know each others fate?
Why are we never happy?
When we have it
all?
How come we can never be strong enough?
And end up loosing it all,
Why do we blame others?
When it’s
clearly not their fault,
Why do we choose to kill each other?
When God decides for us all,
How can we judge people
for their sins,
When we have done worse then them
How can we say some one is not worth it,
When they don’t
see it the same way
How can I write this poem,
And say these things?
How can I write this poem,
When its clearly
not about me,
No one takes the fall,
I guess that is our flaw
And I guess I’m done after all….
Diffrent Worrys
To dealing with two problems at once
Listen To them fight,
No one talk to about it tonight,
I’m
just sorry I’m not alright.
His words ponder in my mind,
“I’ll think about it and call you tonight”,
I
don’t think it will happen with all my might,
I just don’t care,
We had nothing to say but “no”
After
I get this out,
I’m not going to worry about it,
Just for the simple fact I'm used to it,
I’m going to
finish this off with a smile,
Then put it away in my book of pointless rhymes.
I’m going to move on and shut
out the feeling,
Like I always do,
I’ll shut drapes and shut my eyes,
Then I’ll walk away from my mind.
I
will close this poem off with a word from their fight
“Your heart is made of ice”
Over And Over Again
To the things
that run threw my brain again and again
Is he for
real,
Or is he just fake,
Would you believe in life?
Or is death your trait?
Is this writer’s block?
Writing
and writing,
Always the same thing,
I just change the meaning,
Yes I guess it is indeed.
Should I put my pen
away?
Or stay up trying to fix the mistakes.
Am I different?
Or just the same,
Should I follow the crowd?
Or
find my own problems to worry about.
Are you sorry?
Or just don’t care,
Should I end this rhyme now?
Or
write it over and over again.
Author's Comments:
"some times theres just no answers"
Driving Away
I feel like time has slowed down,
Sense he walked out.
The car is going ninety,
But it’s not nearly
fast enough.
I want to pull threw,
Though I think there is no need,
I might has well end my grief,
And I’ll
start by saying this,
Love is nothing more then shit!!
I’m so far gone,
Feel there is no reason to
hold on,
Watch me fall,
I hate to end it this way,
But I’m tired of saying,
It will be ok.
I don’t
care what they’ll say,
Because I’m not going to stick around to hear it.
So judge my soul,
Like you guys
always do,
Mock my mistakes,
Right behind my back,
But I know it all will come right back,
On all of you.
So
now what will you do,
When its put on you
All terable nights you put me threw.
Hope you’re all happy,
That
I’m packing,
And now driving away.
See you all later,
One day you’ll see,
Something you won’t
believe,
It will truly be,
The other part of me.
Some Thoughts
What’s
a soul to do?
When it feels as though it has no room.
Where does a smile go?
When love broke her heart again?
If
you’re wondering why she’s scared,
She’s just afraid it will happen again.
Where do we go when
our time has past?
Will we finally have peace at last?
Some how I know it won’t last……
Spot Light
To my chair
The end of the day is near,
Hear me say “at last”
Finally the
day has past,
I collapse in my chair,
Not willing to go any where.
I sit here now,
In my own spot light,
All
these things on my mind.
Watch the weight of the world slip off my shoulders,
No cares,
No worries,
No, not any
longer,
In my spot light,
I question,
I drift,
I ponder,
Oh I don’t give a shit about the world any
longer.
In my spot light,
Is where I mock myself,
I write and write,
Oh yes I could go on all night.
It’s
my time to make peace,
With Just the evening and me,
I know it would never challenge me,
It just helps drown me into
a place,
Where I could show my face.
In my spot light,
I could forever stay,
Right here,
I could die safe.
In
my spot light,
I don’t need to be fake,
No I don’t have to put on an act.
In my spot light,
You
often hear me say
“Why can’t I make this rhyme?”
Some days I want to cry,
But I always know,
Its
by my side,
And I think there’s just no other way to end this rhyme…
My friend
To my pen
It’s past midnight,
Hear
me say, “Welcome back my friend”,
Here I am once again,
Spilling out my tears and fears on you again.
You
never reply to my pointless wine,
You just help me find a way to make my problems a rhyme.
You truly are my only friend,
You’re
always there to help me cry.
I’m so scared,
What will happen to me this time?
I’m becoming sleep
deprived,
Though With you always by my side,
Some how I know it will be alright,
You’re my pen, my life.
Dear Lord
to matthew
Dear Lord,
He stayed up with me till like four in the morning,
He
most likely had better things to do,
But he was with me anyway.
He helped me critique my writing,
He tired to
lead me..he tired leading me strait to you.
He made all my problems go away for just this time,
I had no care in the
world for just one night.
In return he only wanted one simple thing,
It was so sad for him to have to ask because
I was going to do it anyway.
He told me to say a prayer every night till Thursday,
And if I didn’t hear from him
by Friday, start the prayer all over again.
Dear Lord,
He sounded so scared, I could almost feel his pain.
Yet
he said this in such reassurance.
“I have nothing to hide because I’ve commented no crime”.
Though
he can’t sleep because the problem haunts him deep inside.
Dear Lord,
This mans fate is in your hands.
He
writes in frustration, he feels lost inside im sure,
Yet he still has so much faith in you.
Dear Lord,
I may
never hear from this man again,
He tells me to keep up the faith no matter what.
How can I when this seems like late
night saint,
Is being condemned this way?
So if this ever gets to you up there,
Lord, this is my prayer.
Ill
say it everyday till I know his fate,
Or I speak to him one late Saturday night.
Dear Lord,
Now I know I don’t
talk to you much,
I use your name in vein a lot,
Ill admit it I even talk back to my parents.
And in my defense …every
one lies sometimes.
Lord I put a lot of thought in this,
I even promise I won’t ask for a boyfriend anymore.
Could
you just spare his soul like you did for me once before?
gonna
be gone
to the ppl we say goodbye to
Its amazing what we have been through,
These last couple years,
And some how we’ve made
it,
Through the blood and tears,
And now I’m gonna be leaving soon,
To hopefully find my way,
And God
forbid,
I become astray .
I just wanted to write this fast,
And what I mean to last,
Just wanted to quickly
say,
“I love you”
And now Im on my way
|
